When you’ve survived cancer, the story doesn’t end when treatment does. For many women, the hardest chapters begin afterward—when they’re left to navigate new bodies, changed hormones, and the emotional ripple effects of everything they’ve been through.
That’s exactly why Ashley Rath, the founder of the Rebuild a Bitch organization — a nonprofit organization dedicated to helping women “rebuild, reclaim, and rise even stronger after cancer.” — was built. Inspired by her own experience, Ashley is determined to break the silence around survivorship (especially when it comes to intimacy.)
“Intimacy can be a tough topic after going through cancer treatment. Some women have had body parts literally amputated with mastectomies. Some have reconstruction, some choose to stay flat, but all of which can cause issues with self-esteem and body image. Some women experience medically or surgically induced menopause at a young age (me included),” she shares with Playground.
All of this can impact intimacy. According to new research, a staggering 98 percent of women with breast cancer said side effects from their diagnosis, treatment and even remission, make it difficult for them to be sexually intimate. That’s what Ashley, and Playground, are all about helping.
We really believe in empowering all women (and folks across the gender spectrum) to take their intimacy into their own hands — because, especially after conquering something as serious as cancer, you deserve to feel powerful, sexy and in charge of your own experiences.
Climbing Her Mountain—and Starting a Movement
Ashley was thrust into the cancer fight at age 39. In April 2021, Ashley was diagnosed with stage 2 invasive ductal carcinoma. She endured a lumpectomy, 16 rounds of chemo, 20 rounds of radiation, and surgery that ushered in early menopause.
Surviving all that, she found herself craving more than normalcy, or rather, she wanted badassery. Enter Rebuild a Bitch: a survivor-founded organization centered on mental health and the often-overlooked world of intimacy after cancer.
As Ashley puts it, after everything she endured, she felt like she “just climbed the highest mountain possible… I had made it out [the other] side. I felt like a bad bitch.”
Most survivors get the name. Social media? Not always — but the message still shines through, even when Rebuild-A-B is the name they’re allowed to use.
Intimacy After Cancer: It’s Complicated
Here’s the real scoop: cancer treatments can leave scars beyond the physical. Skin, hormones, confidence can all take a hit.
Survivors routinely grapple with vaginal dryness or atrophy, radically altered libido, and fragile body image. “DAV”—dry-ass vagina—is not a funny punchline—it’s survival talk. So, lubricants and suppositories become lifelines.
“I can speak for myself when I say that treatment for me impacted so many aspects of my sexual relationship,” Ashley says, “When I was going through chemo and lost all my hair, I struggled with feeling desirable and even had concerns with my bodily fluids interacting with my partner, just because hazardous fluids are being injected into your body.”
When you get chemotherapy, she adds, the nurses quite literally approach you in hazmat suits to give you injections.
“Now that I’m single again and post-menopausal, it not only impacts my desire for sex, but also impacts my comfort level in having conversations about vaginal dryness with someone new,” she goes on to explain, “It’s a challenging space to navigate and I’m sure many others have examples beyond what I’ve shared.”
This is where we come in with the whole “make pleasure part of everyday wellness” vibe.
Our Free Love lubricant, Miracle Melts vaginal inserts, and other clean, body-safe goodies are game-changers for cancer survivors seeking gentle, toxin-free intimacy — especially when every ingredient matters. That’s self-care that plays real.
Talking Pleasure (and Healing) Out Loud
Self-love is the healing spark. Ashley says it’s about learning “what pleasure means to you… what feels good… how to talk about what you like.”
Whether you are struggling with solo, or partnered intimacy, during this time, there are ways to find connection. For most cancer survivors, that includes talking about the struggle to heal.
“When I was going through treatment (engaged at that time), it was challenging to navigate the lack of desire for intimacy. I think the most important thing couples can do is find ways to be open with one another and share how they are feeling without putting any pressure on each other,” she shares.
Rebuild a Bitch also offers many resources for navigating this, too.
“As part of our scholarship program, we do have coaches in the intimacy and sex space, so women can apply and potentially work with one of those coaches. They are amazing resources for women!” she adds, “We also try to host virtual (and sometimes in-person when possible) for women impacted by cancer to attend.”
Your Pleasure, Your Power
Ashley’s mission calls on survivors to focus on themselves, unapologetically. Want that trip? Go for it. Need that massage? Book it. Desire nights of pleasure? Own them. Reclaiming power is about refusing to fit into anyone’s mold, but your own.
“The first step is learning how to love yourself and your body again, in all the ways,” Ashley encourages readers, “Learning what makes you happy. Learning what pleasure means to you and what feels good. And most importantly, learning how to talk about what you like.”
Cancer disrupts, but it doesn’t get the final say. Whether it’s re-learning your body, laughing over “DAV,” or choosing toxin-free products like Playground’s clean lubricants, reclaiming intimacy is an essential act of self-love.
After all, pleasure has power — and for survivors, that’s one hell of a comeback story.
